Mum is proud her son, 9, still sleeps with her and hubby and says ‘I don’t care who sleeps where as long as everyone gets rest’
Tamara Ecclestone has revealed she slept in her parents' bed until she was nine and mum-of-five Sara Holdway says there's nothing wrong with that
TAMARA Ecclestone shocked viewers of her TV show this week by admitting she slept in her parents bed until she was nine.
Now mum-of-five Sara Holdway, from Yorkshire, has backed Tamara’s choice and revealed her nine-year-old son still shares a bed with her.
She told the Sun Online; “He was four when we got him his own bed. He wasn’t that keen on being on his own though, so would amble in to our room every night if he woke. He still does that now, even though he’s nine.”
On Tamara’s World the millionaire mum – daughter of Formula 1 billionaire Bernie Ecclestone – was filmed as and daughter Sophia slept in a sumptuous double bed ina hotel while hubby Jay was forced to sleep on a baby bed.
Speaking to the Sun Online earlier this week about her controversial nightly routine, Tamara explained: “Fifi slept in a bassinette next to my bed when she was tiny and then we kinda gave up on that and she just came into the bed.
“I know a lot of people think that co-sleeping is really dangerous and really bad, but it’s been a really positive experience.”
She added: “I slept in my parent’s bed until I was like, nine, we had a giant bed and everyone just slept in the same bed.
“I slept on my dad’s side and my sister slept on my mum’s side, and when we travelled we all shared a bed or like a bedroom or whatever.”
But Tamara is not alone in thinking co-sleeping is fine – even with older kids.
Sara believes it’s fine for kids to sleep in the bed with one or both of their parents, if that’s what the child is happy doing.
“I’ve always co-slept with my kids,“ admits Sara, 35. “It wasn’t something I consciously decided to do – it just kind of happened naturally.
“I’d be doing a night feed with my eldest and we’d both drop off to sleep. When that happened, she’d end up sleeping in the bed with me all night.
“When she was a bit older and in a separate room, she’d often get up in the night, toddle in to my room and climb in.”
Sarah says, back then, co-sleeping was quite frowned upon, so she didn’t tell many people about it.
“I knew I wasn’t doing anything wrong,” she explains,” but I couldn’t be bothered getting into debates with people who just wouldn’t understand or approve.
“My daughter was happy and I was getting more sleep, so I just kept quiet about it.”
Although that child (now 15) has abandoned the idea long ago, Sarah is happy for the younger four to sleep with her and hubby Mark, 51, whenever they like.
“With my son, it was more of a conscious decision,” she says.
“He started off in a Moses basket next to our bed, but he slept better when he was close to me, so after a while, we decided to co-sleep.”
Even though he is now nine, Sarah and Mark were happy for him to be there and know that he feels secure when he’s sleeping cuddled up to his parents.
“People ask me if it’s crowded but we have a giant bed so there’s room for everyone,” Sarah says.
“The kids often play in our room, making tents out of the bedcovers and sometimes they just fall asleep there. That’s fine by me.
“I don’t like to move them once they’ve fallen asleep, so Mark and I just get in beside them.
“To be honest, I don’t mind where they sleep – as long as they get enough sleep.”
She believes that co-sleeping actually benefits children in that it makes them feel more secure as children and ultimately more confident as they grow up.
“There’ll come a time when he doesn’t want to sleep in with us any more – my eldest daughter decided she’d had enough by the age of 7 – but until then, our bedroom door is always open.”
Hubby Mark agrees wholeheartedly with Sarah and says he loves having a crowded bed.
He said: "I love having the kids in bed with us. I love all the snuggles. The more snuggles, the better.
Most read in Fabulous
"It makes sense to bed-share, rather than be up and down all night dealing with four young kids waking up at various points in the night.
“It's a bit of an in-joke at home that no-one cares who sleeps where any more - as long as we all get some sleep!"
Another mum recently admitted sleeping with her parents until she was 12 and said she'd let her kids do the same.
Is co-sleeping a good or bad idea?
Family counsellor and psychotherapist Katerina Georgiou (MA, BA, Reg MBACP Dip. Counselling) says: “Whether co-sleeping benefits parents and children all depends on the attachment of parent and child. If children are already securely attached with no underlying psychological problems (i.e. insecurity or a fear of being away from their parents), then co-sleeping, even at a later age, is fine.
But parents should be wary of a child’s ability to be able to stand on their own two feet without fear of their parents not being there when the child needs them.
In situations, where there is no attachment issue, co-sleeping is perfectly acceptable and positive if all the family are happy with it. It can benefit the child as it allows them to establish a very close bond with the parents. It also gets the child used to sharing space, which is also important.
I must add, however, that when co-sleeping with an older child, it should always be the child’s choice to do so. If it’s the parents demanding that the child shares their bed, then that is a different issue altogether and the parents might want to reflect on why they feel the need to have the child in the bed with them.”
